In reply to a post about rape that I read from daddyfuckedme (the post was deleted due to an uprise in controversy.) But I completely agree. Women are consenting to sex and then later calling it rape. If it happened drunkenly, that is just going to have to be something you regret. In my mind, for…
1. “Women are consenting to sex and then later calling it rape.” What a massive generalization, especially considering the staggering amount of rapes and sexual assaults that go unreported due to the fear of not being taken seriously or believed. There is no empirical evidence for this.
2. “If it happened drunkenly, that is just going to have to be something you regret.” Because you get to decide that.
3. “In my mind, for rape to be rape, you have to have said ‘no’ and they still continued anyways. That is rape.” Some people CANNOT say no, either due to a disability, incoherence due to intoxication (either through drink or the unwitting consumption of a narcotic), coercion, fear of greater physical harm…
4. “Yes, you were incoherent and yes, he took advantage of that, but if you didn’t say no, I don’t understand how it can be rape.” A legal contract isn’t considered binding if the person agreeing to it was incoherent at the time. Sex is no different.
5. “A man doesn’t see it that way, if you’re coming on to him, even if you’re drunk, he thinks you want it.” Ignoring the blatant cissexism inherent in these examples, it is your responsibility to ascertain the consent of the person you’re about to engage in intercourse with.
6. “There are two perspectives to rape, and I’ve watched enough SVU to know that they always take sides with the woman (victim).” Cissexism AND citing a sensationalized television show. Wow. Yes, there are two perspectives to rape. The perspective of the person who raped and the person who the rape happened to.
7. “On another note, there are men who are being put into jail for drunken hook ups? That’s ridiculous.” 3% of rapists serve jail time. That’s in a rape culture with unsympathetic judges and severe victim-blaming and slut-shaming. A culture where a defense attorney’s first plan of attack is to decimate a victim’s reputation. I really doubt that 3% are just products of a terrible misunderstanding.
8. “If in his mind he wasn’t raping you, then he wasn’t.” Do you know how many rapists aren’t even aware that they’re rapists? A staggering number. Whatever semantics an attacker uses to describe themselves doesn’t matter. They’re still a rapist.
9. “Also comes in to play are statutory rape laws, which is completely ridiculous. The law needs to stop being so protective over women and teenage girls. If we consent to sex, it is not rape and it should not be seen as such.” Statutory rape laws are not in place to ruin people’s good times. They are to protect young people (NOT just females) from being victims of coerced sex by older people in authority. Forced consent is not consent, and there are other ways of force besides physical.
10. “The law is seeing us as victims and that’s why we’re being treated as such. I’m nothing close to a feminist, but I know that if you act like a victim you will be treated like one.” You finally got one thing right, you’re not a feminist. If you were, you wouldn’t be pulling the stale ‘asking for it’ defense.
11. “If you want to avoid getting raped at a party, DO NOT GET SHIT FACED TO THE POINT THAT YOU CANNOT KNOWINGLY CONSENT TO SEX.” If you don’t want to be seen as a rapist, don’t try to have sex with someone who’s shit-faced.
12. “My point is, men are being sent to jail for crimes that they didn’t even know they were committing.” No, they really aren’t.