We deserve to be safe.
I would love submissions. I want to build this blog and speak not only from my perspective, but include yours as well.
No matter what you identify as, who you are, if you want to end rape culture, I welcome your ideas and stories.
Also, I don’t mind anonymous asks (as long as they’re not abusive, threatening, or counterintuitive to this blog’s mission.)
54% of sexual assaults are not reported to the police
97% of rapists will never spend a day in jail
54% of rapes/sexual assaults are not reported to the police, according to a statistical average of the past 5 years. Those rapists, of course, never spend a day in prison. Factoring in unreported…
So, tell me again how men are being imprisoned for harmless, drunken hook-ups?
Marital rape occurs when your spouse forces you to take part in certain sex acts without your consent. It is a form of intimate partner violence, i.e., an abuse of power by which one spouse attempts to establish dominance and control over the other. Research shows that…
(via tremblingsecrets)
In reply to a post about rape that I read from daddyfuckedme (the post was deleted due to an uprise in controversy.) But I completely agree. Women are consenting to sex and then later calling it rape. If it happened drunkenly, that is just going to have to be something you regret. In my mind, for…
1. “Women are consenting to sex and then later calling it rape.” What a massive generalization, especially considering the staggering amount of rapes and sexual assaults that go unreported due to the fear of not being taken seriously or believed. There is no empirical evidence for this.
2. “If it happened drunkenly, that is just going to have to be something you regret.” Because you get to decide that.
3. “In my mind, for rape to be rape, you have to have said ‘no’ and they still continued anyways. That is rape.” Some people CANNOT say no, either due to a disability, incoherence due to intoxication (either through drink or the unwitting consumption of a narcotic), coercion, fear of greater physical harm…
4. “Yes, you were incoherent and yes, he took advantage of that, but if you didn’t say no, I don’t understand how it can be rape.” A legal contract isn’t considered binding if the person agreeing to it was incoherent at the time. Sex is no different.
5. “A man doesn’t see it that way, if you’re coming on to him, even if you’re drunk, he thinks you want it.” Ignoring the blatant cissexism inherent in these examples, it is your responsibility to ascertain the consent of the person you’re about to engage in intercourse with.
6. “There are two perspectives to rape, and I’ve watched enough SVU to know that they always take sides with the woman (victim).” Cissexism AND citing a sensationalized television show. Wow. Yes, there are two perspectives to rape. The perspective of the person who raped and the person who the rape happened to.
7. “On another note, there are men who are being put into jail for drunken hook ups? That’s ridiculous.” 3% of rapists serve jail time. That’s in a rape culture with unsympathetic judges and severe victim-blaming and slut-shaming. A culture where a defense attorney’s first plan of attack is to decimate a victim’s reputation. I really doubt that 3% are just products of a terrible misunderstanding.
8. “If in his mind he wasn’t raping you, then he wasn’t.” Do you know how many rapists aren’t even aware that they’re rapists? A staggering number. Whatever semantics an attacker uses to describe themselves doesn’t matter. They’re still a rapist.
9. “Also comes in to play are statutory rape laws, which is completely ridiculous. The law needs to stop being so protective over women and teenage girls. If we consent to sex, it is not rape and it should not be seen as such.” Statutory rape laws are not in place to ruin people’s good times. They are to protect young people (NOT just females) from being victims of coerced sex by older people in authority. Forced consent is not consent, and there are other ways of force besides physical.
10. “The law is seeing us as victims and that’s why we’re being treated as such. I’m nothing close to a feminist, but I know that if you act like a victim you will be treated like one.” You finally got one thing right, you’re not a feminist. If you were, you wouldn’t be pulling the stale ‘asking for it’ defense.
11. “If you want to avoid getting raped at a party, DO NOT GET SHIT FACED TO THE POINT THAT YOU CANNOT KNOWINGLY CONSENT TO SEX.” If you don’t want to be seen as a rapist, don’t try to have sex with someone who’s shit-faced.
12. “My point is, men are being sent to jail for crimes that they didn’t even know they were committing.” No, they really aren’t.
13.
(Source: toughbuns, via think-im-justhappy)
Did you resist the assault, or did you submit? This is a question asked of survivors often by ourselves, by those who love us and who may mean well, and it is also a question present within sexual violence discourses. For example, last year the House of Representatives passed the No Taxpayer Funding for Abortion Act except in cases of rape or incest. However, the definition of rape was narrowed specifically to “forcible rape” in which the victim had to be physically subdued, fought constantly, and could prove it through medical exams. This can be a question that is especially triggering for survivors. Particularly if what you did to resist the attack is not validated within the mainstream as “fighting back” which also falls into the constructed idea that most offenders are strangers to the victims and that the victim is able bodied.
I want to complicate this idea of “fighting back.” First off, ALL sexual violence, by its very definition, is forcible. Second off, “fighting back” is a very ableist concept shaped by the belief that everyone has the physical ability to kick and scream during an attack. Saying no is fighting back. Expressing no through your body language is fighting back. Kicking and screaming is fighting back. Trying to leave is fighting back. Crying is fighting back. We ALL fought back.
This normative concept of “fighting back” is also a victim blaming technique. [Trans] Womyn of color are seen as hypersexual and welcoming to all sexual advances and the gatekeepers to all sexual activity. It is seen as being only our responsibility to stop the sexual assault, regardless of how strong, manipulative or powerful our attacker was. No responsibility or culpability is given to the attacker when they are the ones who violated consent, bodily integrity, and our wishes/concerns.
(via slutwalkseattle)
[gifs from Legally Blonde:
1. elle: “i feel comfortable using legal jargon in everyday life.”
2. a man whistles at elle.
3. elle: “i object!”
4. elle smiles for the camera]
Elle Woods was hollering back before the movement. This is why i love this movie. It’s so progressive. Elle is a femme feminist who comes by it the hard way. She doesn’t change for the bookish people, the elitists, or for the feminists. She just does what she needs to do, and what she wants, even when at first it was chasing a boy. Then the movie drops the romance. IT DROPS THE ROMANCE. chick flicks don’t do that. Emmett asking her out is a footnote at the very end. And this whole time, she is classy, and lady like, and has pride in herself and her work. She’ll go to a costume party as a playboy bunny, but like hell will she sleep with her professor for an internship. Elle is my feminist role model
(Source: jasonnywithnochance, via disabledbyculture)
communismkillsitonthedancefloor:
See, here’s the thing. Making fun of rape, and threatening to rape a woman (even as a joke), supports a system that violently oppresses women. Violence against women is validated through the continuous intimidation of women via…
As you probably know by now, Daniel Tosh has a history of being sexist and misogynist—but I bet you didn’t know that, on his television show, he actively solicited his male viewers to take videos of themselves physically harassing women, and then upload those videos to the internet.
Just in case they didn’t understand what it was he wanted them to do, he then played video of himself doing it. You know, as a visual aid.
I know you’ll be shocked to hear that his viewers did exactly what he asked.
(Extra bonus: fat-shaming! “Make sure she’s aware that you are in fact feeling a roll.”)
Sign the petition to get Comedy Central to kick this guy off the air.
Note that the network said fuck-all when this “go grope women!” segment aired —more than a year ago. So yeah, we need to make some noise.
oh my god
Rapists look for the spots where boundaries cannot or will not be enforced. They don’t really care why. They are opportunists. They do what works. They can’t be changed. And we sure can’t wait around for the people who can’t defend their boundaries to change it; they’re doing what they can with what they have where they are. More than that, the boundary violations tend to work by degrees, so that the little ones build the foundation for the big ones, and by the time the rape happens the rapist stands on a stepladder of disempowerment. What we as a wider community need to do, if we care about solving the problem, is to take down the ladder. We need to look for the places where boundaries can’t and won’t be enforced … and fix them. We can’t start when and where the rapes happen. We have to start at the beginning. We have to believe that bodily autonomy is a human right, and that the little violations matter. If the whole culture believed that, it might not end all rape, but it would end a culture where rape is normalized and generally unpunished.
— The Boiling Frog Principle Of Boundary Violation « (via sacet)
(via slutwalkseattle)
Daniel Tosh perpetuates rape culture and his response to that “heckler” was to silence her, which is what happens when women speak up and demand to be treated as humans with feelings who do not want to be treated as jokes and do not want to have the most humiliating violation of their bodies to be punchlines. As long as Tosh is on the air, men will continue to see nothing wrong with rape and rape culture—and the women who speak out against it are “bitches” and “ignorant sluts”.
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—Kathleen Quinlan, Take Daniel Tosh Off the Air (via limegl0wstix)
http://www.change.org/petitions/ceo-comedy-central-take-daniel-tosh-off-the-air
(via velvettulip)
yo here’s that petition
(via frostrune)
Everyone PLEASE sign this! Daniel Tosh silences women just like the rapists he supports. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE sign this.
(via bike-notes)
(via slutwalkseattle)
